I Think I Would Rather Be Happy

I'm at the age where I'm starting to feel the pressure to figure my life out... maybe most of us are. I don't know about you, but I suck at it. I get so caught up in what I'm gonna do next year or the year after or even tomorrow. But eff it.. I mean, why waste all this time when I could  be making valuable investments into who I AM?

I'm pretty sure AM is a present tense word. We hear it all the time "live for the moment" wwooo yea. But really? How beneficial is it to live that way all the time? There's a difference between living without consideration of future repercussions and living with a sense of appreciation for what you have now. Living each day to the fullest is obvi not a bad thing.

mmmbunny trail.

What you do and who you are: two completely different things! (ps. I didn't come to this conclusion by myself. I've been hearing this alot lately) Let's try to focus on who we are and who we want to become, not just what we're going to do. Because what you DO will come out of who you ARE. Be committed to being. It's a happier, simpler place. Then, when something doesn't work out, you're still you.

You haven't lost.

Is it possible to not love her?

SWEATER TIME!

First, I would like to thank Scott deVries for fixing my blog...I am back.

It's getting cold and closer to the time of year the average  Canadian dreads.  But lately I've been looking at it with a different perspective. More coffee and more sweaters!! Yeeeeaa boooyy.

I'm loving oversized secondhand sweaters and even mock-secondhand styles... but it does take swag to pull off thrift clothing.



Kate Gilbert

  

Gina Tricot



lookbook is brilliant.



http://lookbook.nu/  <3



ugh.

So lately my blog hasn't been letting me post pictures or change font...

You Never Know...

So tonight I took a break from my reading and homework and decided to go out for coffee with my sister and my parents. Seriously, I feel like my brain is reaching it's capactiy with SLI in the morning plus online courses in the afternoon and whatever thinking I have to do in between. (I tend to lose focus easily so reading is a challenge) Anyways...

Back on  topic.

I love Coffee Culture.  We went there first, but it was full. There was a semi-decent looking guy playing and I was sad to leave his semi-decent singing. But we decided to go somewhere else. I was going to say where, but this is a blog and the more info I write about where I go, the more likely a creepy person could find meeee.

So we were at a certain restaurant that I love and got our coffees. And our waiter was awesome, even though we weren't ordering any actual food. My parents are outgoing and that kinda got passed on to a couple of us kids, so it's inevitable to start talking. We got to know this guy... he's an artist that's actually making money ( <3 ) and doesn't believe in cell phones because he thinks people should be able to approach eachother face to face, and he has a 9 month nephew, and he's interested in history, and he writes.

And,  I dunno, I just kinda thought about how there are so many interesting people in the world. After leaving and saying "he was nice" my mom said, "well you never know if someone is nice until you're nice to them". Simple, yet profound to me for some reason. I guess I never really realized until lately how much little interactions with people mean to me. Even people I will never see again. It's just cool to know we're all living on the same planet going about our lives, yet we're all connected somehow.

Life gets more interesting when we reach out. We individually have to make the choice to initiate. Even in the littlest way. It just reminds you of the good in the world. I mean, how many people's work days could I brighten up by starting a conversation in Subway, or with the barista, or with that same guy at that same corner store when he's ringing through my same immense candy purchase, or whatever.  When you're friendly you get better service too,  just sayin. And I love it when people that come into work are cool. It makes me happy. and better at my job.

So I pretty much fell in love tonight.
Too bad waiter artist is 31.

Good boys under 20! Good boys under 20! Stop being non existent...thanks!

Tori

Brooke Fraser "FLAGS"

Brilliantly meaningful lyrics.
A couple 'meh' songs, but creative concepts nonetheless.
Well-thought-out music to back up smooth vocals.
Duets!! yaay! with Aqualung and William Fitzsimmons.
Sometimes hard to hear what she's saying, but overall, a heartfelt compilation and a unique sound. I am a fan.

Fave tracks:
Orphans' Kingdoms
Who Are We Fooling (feat. Aqualung)
Crows and Locusts
Sailboats
Something in the Water

Everyone connects with emotion

tattoos

LIGHTS is my hero...

I like these...

Not that I would choose this text, but I love the look...

Crap butterly, but I like this location/size...

And a bonusss picture ferrr good measure
A well tattooed boy...

:)

You Might as Well Be a Pile of Dog Crap

Lukewarm's taking over the world.
Grey is a popular place to reside, to resort, to hide when we don't feel like striving for anything of actual depth. Just Grey.
No colour. No life.
Just... pure... apathy.

And it's gross.

If you know me or have ever read my blog before, you know that I can be brutally honest and don't give a rats bum about being blunt. I'm not writing this for the sake of having blog material, and I'm not trying to sound smart. This is just straight up fresh revelation .So here I go...

People are pathetic. I am pathetic. This world is pathetic. I mean, who do we think we are to take up space here if we're living for nothing? Only a small few still stand as an army of warriors carrying this one simple weapon I believe we were created to possess: passion. Passion. Where is all the freakin' passion these days man? Why is indifference such a common default? I think because it requires nothing of us.

I'm not trying to judge or condemn anybody here... dude, I was there, and still go there. Everyone has. But the hardest people still care too. They still look for purpose. They still want something to strive for, to live for. The most dangerous people aren't the cold-hearts. It's the people who know better, yet choose to make their own way. This is lukewarm. And too many of us have fallen into its traps.

Lukewarm is one foot in, one foot out. A lack of integrity. It's contradicting. A lack of self-awareness. It's a recipe for emotional suicide. A lack of power. It's just tiring. Lukewarm holds people back. Lukewarm will deny. Check this out... Lukewarm will get the worst of both worlds. Lukewarm almost cost me my life.

I want be clear. Clear is this... what you say and what you're about matches the way you're living your life. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. It's been said time and time again, tried, tested and truuuue. Just stand. Be confident in it.

I believe that God created us for a great purpose and that He loves everybody and wants us to have relationship with Him. I don't know who is actually reading this blog right now, but no matter who you are... God is head over heels in love with YOU.

Even if you don't believe in God, I encourage you to find something to stand for. Something to give your life meaning. A cause to give your life for. When you are clear, people can respect you for it and believe that you're actually legit.

Because if life's just a party, when the party's over... who do you have left?

Think about it.


Thanks so so much for reading.

Banksy...

... you're so cool.

Why I Love Mumford and Sons

     If you haven't heard of Mumford and Sons, they're a British folk-rock band formed in 2007. A bunch of dope guys from London basically. The band released a couple EP's, then some singles, then their first full album Sigh No More in October 2009. And... I... love.. it.

     The funny thing about this band is that you either love 'em or hate 'em, or so I've gathered from the many times I've gotten excited about them, only to be shut down by certain people who can't appreciate real music... Yep, I'm being harsh, but you people deserve it. You uncultured people you. *said in sarcastic voice*

Why I Love Mumford and Sons:

1) The Style

     It's really hard to explain, actually. A salad bowl of folk, rock, bluegrass, indie/alt, and old westernish honky tonk whatever it's called. It's just, in my opinion, a great collabo of genres.

Mumford's vocal tone gets me too - kinda husky, raw,and little pitchy. Authentic and not over-produced or manufactured. The recording is raw like that too and sounds like a live recording. AND the mix of instruments is really good -  banjo, tamborine, brass the whole nine yards baby 

2) Lyrics

     These guys actually have legit stuff to say. They offer depth and meaning in their music, but they don't take themselves too seriously, which makes for a perfect blend of lyric and actual music. The lyrics are straight-forward  but often pretty deep. "Little Lion Man" is an example of a song with clear, frank lyrics.

One of my personal Favourites, "Winter Winds" is just perfectly poetic, yet the meaning doesn't drown under an ocean of useless metaphors. Like that one. :\

     And if your strife strikes at your sleep

     Remember spring swaps snow for leaves
    You'll be happy and wholesome again
    When the city clears and sun ascends

Other Mumford and Sons Favourites:

- "The Cave"
- "Awake My Soul"
- "Roll Away Your Stone"
- All of them :)


3) I Feel Like I'm in Ireland
'Nuff said.
Now go listen.

http://www.myspace.com/mumfordandsons

            

When I Grow Up...

We've all said it. "When I grow up I want to be a doctor, teacher, panda etc etc, fill in the blank". "When I grow up I'm going to dot dot dot fill in the blank". Or how bout this one - "When I grow up I'll be able to do whatever I want".  Ha.

I'm pretty sure everybody has at least thought about something they want to do in the future. I personally have a ton of ideas I'd like to see played out in my life eventually. Everyone has dreams and goals, even if they don't realize it. But is achieving a goal the ultimate point of life? Is the prime time of our lives - the time when we feel the most fulfilled in the pathway we've chosen to take - is that the epitome of life's awesomeness and meaning and then we die? What does fulfillment even look like? What does "I've finally made it" look like? What does having the family, the business, the career, the $$$$, the cars, the crib, the ministry, the friends, or the lifestyle look like? And once we get there is that it? We're done?

I've heard many times from many people that life is not about the destination but the journey. Don't compromise gaining from the present because of a vision for the future. Striving for that career or that family or that lifestyle is all fine, but are we giving up a sick life now because our heads are always in the clouds?! Well, guess what... that happened to me. Every time I was going through depression, I would tell myself the future will always be brighter and I would literally think about myself as a middle-aged woman with the perfect life and the perfect career and I thought that somehow thinking about this all the time was justifying my present "wallowing in the mud" behaviour that was stopping me from getting the most out of life. And highschool pretty much sucked some major balls.

So I encourage you to enjoy where you are now, whatever stage. It takes hard work in the present to achieve the things we want later anyways, and how much further do we want to push the manifestation of those things by putting off the effort it takes by having a "one day" mindset.

If life is about the journey, I'd hate to go to my grave knowing that I achieved a check-list of goals but had no fun getting there and had lost what was most important along the way. Deep stuff man.

Anger is Passion

What makes you angry?

The first thing that came to your head is something you are passionate about. That may sound weird, and you may be thinking, "how can you be passionate about something you hate"? Well, take what angers you and do something to change it, that's where we get truly passionate world-changers.

One of the biggest injustices that get's be passionate is sexual abuse and human trafficking.
Check out this site, I love what they stand for.

http://love146.org/

With Every Painting There's a Story: Part One

Here are a few of my favourite paintings thus far... explained.



1) Usually when I paint, I am inspired by song lyrics. I dunno, it just makes painting more fun when you incorporate a song theme into it. This piece doesn't actually have a title yet, but the song is "I Will Follow You Into the Dark" by Death Cab For Cutie.  To me, the song speaks of sacrificial love and a kind of love that causes two people to stick together through dark times. This image shows two people gripping hands as they are about to fall of the roof of a tall building in the middle of the city. Slightly morbid?.... meh it's art.



2) I painted this during the summer. I had just gone through a phase of being obsessed with hippies and hippie-ish things for some reason?? and so I was feeling inspired by Woodstock '69 and the song "Summer of 69" by Bryan Adams, especially the line "We were young and restless, we needed to unwind". To me, this painting symbolizes freedom in being chill with who you are and just an overall atmosphere of tranquility in doing what you love. Yes, she's naked.. deal with it.  :)

Notice, the colour choices and use of lighting. Colour and lighting contrast always make a painting for me. COLOUR and LIGHTING.

Also, I've been able to utilize an oil paint brushstroke technique (thick, choppy, brushy) that I love, even though I haven't had much chance to experiment with oils.




3) This is my Grammy, Nicole, when she was in her 20's. She died four years ago. The photo I used was a flawless black and white thing of amazingness. She looked like a model, and this picture couldn't do it justice. I invented my own colours, giving it a warm appearance. Notice the brushstrokes again. I think maybe this is my style?



4) This baby is near and dear to me, BECAUSE it is the first painting I ever sold, without it being custom made. It was just on display at a talent show at my highschool and a random guy bought it for $300 in cash. Sickest thaang? Yes. That definately gave me a confidence boost and made me think that maybe my art is worth something.

Panda Dogs

So at first, I thought these were legit. BUT now I realize they are the product of desperate dog-owners needing (like myself I guess) to have a pet panda. So desperate they are spray-painting their pets.  I guess it's not that bad if you're dog is a chow chow...

... But I think the next couple are a little try-hard:

...Really??

Wearing Mock Ray Bans Doesn't Make You an Indie Kid

The year of The Hipster is upon us. From 1960's inspired fashions to a rise in artistic appreciation, homosexuality, free-thinking, and Alternative/Folk/Indie band fans, pop culture has shifted over the last couple years. To be quite honest, I believe this phase is dwindling. Everybody (*generalization*) wants to be hipster nowadays, especially (it seems) young Canadians wishing to embrace the eccentricity fad. Hmmm... a bit of an oxymoron, eh? Eccentricity fad. I think it's interesting to look into this, coming from someone who I guess you could say has embraced 'indie' culture in several aspects herself. One thing many people don't realize is that being hipster does not make you an indie kid >> a highly sought-after image/identity/stereotype. There is absolutely nothing wrong with dressing hipster or sincerely enjoying indie music, but there is a difference and let's not get the two confused. The term 'indie' literally means "Free from external control or constraint." it describes an anti-conformist, free- thinker, or independant person. A 'hipster' is supposed to mean the same thing, but someone who is 'hip' is simply trendy, cool, up-to-date, and well, just like everyone else. So where am I going with this? The real hippies think for themselves and don't look for a stereotype. In the same way we should all do what we do because that's what we want to do, or be passionate about what we're passionate about cuz that's what truly makes us tick. Can't we just be individuals without titles??? Let me close by saying this: wearing mock Ray Bans doesn't make you an indie kid.

I Used to Judge Bloggers

So here I am, writing my first real blog and it's a little embarrassing to be honest. I mean, I like writing and sharing my perspective and all that crap, but honestly? Blogging?? I guess I used to think blogging was for cheese n corn lovers that had way too much time on their hands. But then I started realizing the influence social media has today and the great opportunity it is to have resources like this. Good on ya bloggers for putting yourself out there and taking the judgement. SOOO what the heck? Imma start a blog. And it's gon be goood. Stay tuned!